Some (very) vanilla people were having a discussion about BDSM. The sub would have felt this emotion, the slave would not have wanted to do that. How/why would someone ever allow themselves to be in certain circumstances? Yada, yada, yada.
Here are my thoughts and part of my response. By all means, let me know what you think.
Take a step back for a moment.
Around us each day we see examples of different types of relationships. While some few are truly between equals, most of what we see is power imbalance of varying levels. This can range from the person who is always thinking of others and gets pleasure from putting them first, to outright abuse. Add in emotional needs from environmental factors and you have a dizzying array of what may be.
Not everyone likes to acknowledge this, but all relationships have some value of D/s or power imbalance.
Do you make a meal you don't prefer on a regular basis to please another? Have you watched a movie you have no interest in because that is what your partner desires? Yielded an argument to have peace? Does love cause you to put someone else first in your life? Does it bring you pleasure to put the other first and see their pleasure?
What if you are so exhausted from the daily grind that you simply can't think or function except from moment to moment? Have you always had to be the strong one in your life and you yearn for someone else to be responsible, for even a short while?
Perhaps your environment made you feel the need to be in control at all times. Do you insist on what you want over anothers wishes? Long to take charge and care for someone who is not making the best decisions?
These things exist in all relationships. BDSM and D/s just acknowledges more openly what is already there and often takes it 10 steps farther.
Some play at this and no worries, it is all good fun. Bedroom Bondage is just that. A little spice for otherwise content partners. There are those that are vanilla in the rest of their lives, but maybe for a weekend or special occasion..?
By the time one has reached the level of Master/slave (consensually not abusively) the dynamic has reached such a point that it truly DOES NOT MATTER what the Master wants, the slave is happy and eager to give it to them and derives great pleasure from doing so.
Even for those who are more serious, there are so many levels and niches it boggles the mind. Just remember, for every rule there is an exception, especially in BDSM & D/s.